The color blue is everywhere.
I know it exists.
I read about it in books.
I hear about it in songs.
People talk about it all the time.
Yet I am unable to perceive it.
I am always acutely aware of blue.
I understand the appeal of blue
for other people.
I am even happy for those
who can see and enjoy blue.
I am able to appreciate the beauty
Of a blue-eyed man,
In a blue shirt.
My inability to see blue
Doesn't extinguish
My longing for love,
Affection,
Romance.
Some people see me as damaged,
They think I stopped seeing blue as a result of trauma.
It's not the case.
They think I'm faking it for attention.
I should try harder.
I’m missing out on a basic human need.
They tell me:
Go see a specialist.
Get it fixed.
It’s unnatural.
The truth is
I do see blue,
Occasionally.
It happens when I am in love,
And feel loved in return.
It happens when I feel
Seen,
Heard,
Safe.
It happens when I experience
Deep
Meaningful
Connection.
Dear reader, go back and read it again.
Substitute the word blue with sexual attraction.
That is what it feels like to be on the asexual spectrum.
For me specifically.
I don’t need to be fixed.
I just need to be loved.
Until gray clouds give way
To blue skies.
I remember how you recited it last June and had everyone marvelling at the simplicity, the vulnerability, and the depth. Thank you for sharing it with the wider world too!!